Power In The P

N****s will lose they mind for it. Wine for it, dine for it.
Spend time for it, see no colored line for it.

Sza feat Kendrick Lamar (Doves In the Wind)

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Image from Black Lotus Mother

The power of the vagina is incredible. It’s a self-cleaning machine, it bleeds without injury and gets wet without water. Not to mention that tiny hole that we have is elastic! We push out babies from that tiny hole every day making a new generation.

The things that men will go through to get it is truly mind blowing and if it’s good, the things they’ll tolerate to keep getting it is proof that the vagina is like no longer.

Months ago I saw a status made by one of my Facebook friends and it had me wondering “damn is this really true? This can’t be true.”

This is what the post said…

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This is coming from a man so I was intrigued that he made this status. I’m a woman so I have no idea what the inside of another female feels like. Even if this was a joke.. some jokes hold truth. I over analyze everything so of course me being me, I read all 72 comments under this status just to see what other people thought about this.

Afterwards I made a poll about this on my Instagram and had my male followers engage on the topic. Out of seventy-five comments, seventy-three of the comments were men disagreeing with the status.

Khalif, 24, disagreed saying that some women can reach a different level of being turned on sexually.

‘Some females can control muscles better than others and some females just can reach a different level of being turned on which is why they can get wetter and do other things like squirt easier and more frequently.’

Jae, 22, also disagreed with the status. ‘Some women have kids, that’s a different feeling. Some women workout a lot, which helps them strengthen them muscles to rap around your meat, which is a different feeling. Some women are really emotional and get beyond wet when you touch them the right way, and make them feel special. Some women’s hygiene is so good and they drink so much water that their pussy is literally like water, which is a different feeling. The pussy varies by age and experience so no I don’t agree he just ain’t doing it right.’

I’m glad y’all got some sense because I knew I wasn’t tweakin’, I still wanted to get perspective from other males.

Yes, as women we all have the same private parts and holes but they feel different and look different. Some clitiours are bigger or smaller than others, some females get wetter than others depending on how much water they drink or how turned on they are. It’s different things that you have to factor in especially when it comes to the vagina.

Metro says that vaginas may each be different in terms of texture and curves, it’s likely that those differences wouldn’t be picked up by penetration with the penis.

Web MD says that penis sensitivity starts to decline with age, lessening from age 25 and up. One person’s penis may be more sensitive than another man so those men will feel two completely different experiences. Just like some men penis don’t feel the same to women because of shapes and sizes this goes for women’s vagina as well.

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Other things to factor in is if you actual have a connection with that person or not. If you’re having meaningless sex with different women then, of course to you they may all feel the same because you’re not fully engaged with them.

Warmth, lubricate, and grip varies and can change over time. However, think about how sex feels with the woman that you like or love versus sex with someone that you barely know.

If all vagina felt the same then why put so much effort to get it?!

MY POINT EXACTLY

In this video where ASAP Rocky talks about double standards concerning men and women, he says “it’s a man’s world but pussy makes the world go ’round.”

Men smell good for women. Men get nice things for themselves but they get those things to be noticed by a woman. A man may take you out because he like’s you but he wants the prize between your legs too. He may pay your bills to take care of you and because he loves you but baby he wants to keep getting that thang too! That’s just how it goes.

Tupac said it the best…

“Revenge is like the sweetest joy next to getting pussy.”

 

 

Intimacy: Touch Me In Different Ways

‘Lay your head on my pillow, here you can be yourself. No one has to know what you are feeling, no one but me & you’

– Alicia Keys (Diary)Images by meandsomebodyson_ & meandsomebodydaughter

Beyond a relationship, dating, and even the talking stage… Is there a friendship? Is there intimacy?

When we make connections with people especially the ones that we are dating or possibly see a future with, we forget the small things. Those small things consists of friendship, trust, and intimacy.

Intimacy isn’t always about sex. You can touch each other in different ways, not just physical.

Intimacy is a bond you share with another person. Through that bond, you know that person like the back of your hand and things become more secure.

Psych Central says that getting to the core of a relationship requires that both people work through their fear. By visiting and revisiting these areas, intimacy matures and mellows over time.

That’s exactly what holds us back from a lot of things. FEAR.

The fear of being judged because of personality traits that you don’t want the other to see or flaws and insecurities that you may have. That’s understandable because we always want to show up as our highest self, but how do you expect to get to that root of closeness with a person if you haven’t shown them who you really are? Take the mask off.

Our friends that we acquire in our lives have seen the beautiful sides of us and the deep down in the gutter us. Even through all of that they love us anyway. You know why? Because they’re willing to go through the good and bad with us.

That should be applied to your person of interest as well. Having sex is fun but it becomes boring after a while. You have to keep each other interested.

You don’t have to have lame conversations. Lord knows I hate when a person “wyd” me to death. Ask them how there day is going, what their childhood was like, what’s the one thing they want to do before they die, how are they feeling & etc.

I remember a time when this boy stayed the night with me. We were laying in my bed naked but we didn’t have sex… We listened to music and talked all night and honestly, I was happy we didn’t do anything because from there it established that we could actually chill together. I also think that’s one of the reasons why we never fell off. That situation made us like each other more. I told my friends about it and they were just as shocked as me cause things usually don’t happen that way, but I knew it was definitely more there. (Lol I’ll keep y’all updated I’m still seeing how this is going to play out) etc.

In Alicia Keys song ‘Diary‘ she says:

“I won’t tell, your secrets

Your secrets are safe with me

I will keep, your secrets

Just think of me as the pages in your diary.”

That song went number one because that type of closeness and comfortability is something that we all crave. To be able to truly vent to someone and be yourself with them is unmatched.

On top of that, go out and explore together! Take initiative and make plans. Everything doesn’t have to be labeled as a date, you can enjoy each other’s company. If y’all click then the romance is going to be there regardless, you don’t have to be lovey dovey with everything.

Be vulnerable. Be fun. Be silly. Trust each other.

The world has our minds thinking that we have to be so cold-hearted and put up a wall with everyone we come in contact with when that’s not good at all. You don’t have to share everything all at once but you can give bits and pieces of yourself at a time. Rejection happens and it’s awful but you shouldn’t let that stop you from opening up to the next person.

Psych Alive says most of us say that we want to find a loving partner, but many of us have deep-seated fears of intimacy that make it difficult to be in a close relationship. The experience of real love often threatens our self-defenses and raises our anxiety as we become vulnerable and open ourselves up to another person.

Things last more when they aren’t rushed and when there’s a companionship. Remember you’re still getting to know each other, not only know each other LEARN each other.

Marriage  says when you jump into a relationship without being friends first, all types of issues and challenges occur, and you begin to expect more from the person and sometimes set unrealistic expectations.

That’s why some of us don’t know how to be intimate without sex being involved. You skipped over the most important step, but it’s okay. It’s never too late to pick each other’s head. Just relax and let things flourish. Most of all be patient, things will happen in its own time.

Snatching Souls

‘Cause I love it when you’re looking down at me, I’m looking up at you.. And I don’t give a damn shawty, watch me knock your boots off’

– The Weeknd (What You Need)

A blessing and a curse.

The art of soul snatching is real! People often think that it’s just a individual dominating someone else’s body while their in ecstasy but it’s more. Orgasms and climaxes are natural but that does NOT mean you’ve ‘snatched someone’s soul’.

Soul snatching is being able to control your opposition not only physically but with your mind. A soul snatcher will entice your mind , leaving you fully open to experiencing new things outside your comfort zone.

Love Sex And Passion says They’ll please you and control you at the same time.

Not only is soul snatching real but so are soul ties. Each time a man connects with a woman sexually releasing his liquids and energy within her, he leaves a part of his DNA. If she doesn’t clean herself then it remains inside of her, leaving an impression which causes a person to become sexual addicted to that individual.

Sex is more than just a physical act, it’s spiritual as well. The more we are with a person especially in a sexual way, we start to develop their habits without even knowing it.

Jet Magazine says you ultimately become who you exchange with in the physical sense, so be mindful about who you choose.

Even when using a condom, spiritually transmitted demons can interrupt your spirit.

Have you ever noticed that some men and women can’t get over that one particular person that has caused them emotional trauma? No matter if it’s been months or years, the very sound of their name or even seeing their face just fills them up with disgust! It’s because something within them that wasn’t right tormented your inner being. Then eventually the only thing that was holding the relationship or bond together was the sex.

Sometimes that soul tie even causes us to attract that very person that we despise. It could be a different person, yet the same behavior. It all becomes familiar.

Pay attention to the way you are around this person. Are you calm and comfortable or are you sad for no reason or feeling empty?

I was always taught about soul ties and energies as a child but I never understood what it truly meant, especially when it came to sex. It wasn’t until I entered my twenties and had my own experiences is when I found out that it wasn’t a theory.

A couple of years ago, I was bonded to someone that I thought that I could potentially be with but it seemed like we were always clashing. There were times where I knew that the affects he had on me were destructive but I couldn’t shake him. It was a love/hate thing mixed with lust.

The more we linked up it seemed that we would literally exchange feelings. In the beginning I was always the happy one and he was always the sad one that felt like the world was on his shoulders.. then that all shifted into me becoming the depressed one and him becoming the ‘happy for no reason’ partner.

Once I finally came to my senses and ended it, I compared my experience with him to others. All the good and the bad was put into evaluation and I can truly say that we were tied together for all the wrong reasons. Even though I was hurt and didn’t want to believe it, I felt a sense of relief.

Women fall in love based on emotions even when they know the facts. Men fall in love based on facts, even if they have a strong connection or feeling for you they won’t let that overpower their decision on if they see a long term future with you.

MyBlackMatters says that many times we fall in love without realizing what it is we’re falling into. When a woman is led by her emotions this makes it easy for her to be taken advantage of. She may be sexually compatible with a man who has no idea how to care for her heart.

The same thing goes for men. This is why we have to be cautious of who we are exchanging liquids, energy, and spirits with. You don’t know what good or bad affects that person may have on you.

If you’re going to get your ‘soul snatched’ make sure you know who’s doing the snatching, you may be sleeping with the devil and you don’t even know it! Men and women your bodies are temples, your souls are flowers and your minds are butterflies. Treat them as such.

So ask yourself…

How many souls have I snatched? How many souls are living inside of you? Are we connected or are we attached?

“I always say, never sleep with someone you wouldn’t want to be.”

– Lisa Chase Patterson

Does Body Counts Matter To You?

‘I can tell that you been practicing.. All those other men were practice, they were practice

Yeah, for me, for me, for me’

– Drake (Practice)

Photographed by Lula Hyers

The past is never really in the past. When we get to know someone we want to know all about them.. their background, best memories, favorite food, childhood traumas, tastes in music, and past relationships. Then that dreadful question is asked….

‘What’s your body count?’

Usually when a man asks this question, he’s trying to see how innocent or freaky you are. When a woman asks this question she’s trying to see how experienced you are or if you even have some self control.

This makes things complicated and a little awkward because if you tell the truth, you’ll be judged on if you have some type of discipline or if you’re just being a thot.

(Thot is a slang term which originated from a Chicago rapper named Chief Keef meaning hoe or slut.)

Then if you lie about your past sexual partners you’ll get judged anyway if the truth is ever found out because no one likes a liar. Regardless the truth is hard to take in but its necessary.

Men are often pressured to lie about their sexual encounters to make them seem like they’re well experienced and if they don’t have this huge number connected to them, it makes them seem like they don’t get any action. Women are pressured to knock off a couple of numbers of their past lovers to make them seem like they’re ‘good girls’.

It’s crazy how these cultural stereotypes have our minds wrapped up in them like this.

Mel Magazine says men are supposed to go out there and get all they can while they can; women are supposed to seem discerning about who they let get up in there. Women are supposed to guard their virginity for love; men are supposed to get it over with as soon as possible or risk eternal humiliation. It follows then, that women would feel pressured to still seem pure, while men would feel pressured to seem experienced.

We’re all human and sexual beings by nature. Having sex is normal, no matter who we choose to lay down with or how many times we lay down with one person or multiple people.

Men can be openly sexual about their partners but why can’t a women acknowledge her sexual awakening and be as free as a man? Why is there so much double standards on something that were all doing?

Odyssey says that the number of people you personally include in your body count doesn’t define you in any way, but we still place this extreme amount of importance on it.

This is true. I’ve been around a lot of men who prefer women to have a certain amount of sexual parters because they claim that it shows that she’s pure, tight, and isn’t passing herself around.. but what about you?

The body is a temple regardless if you’re a man or a woman so shouldn’t that apply to men as well? Just because you have more sex partners than others doesn’t mean that you don’t respect yourself. Women love sex just as much as men, sometimes more the men. Yet men and women still set these unrealistic expectations on things that don’t even matter.

Dollar Shave Club reported that between zero and 10 is the range that people generally prefer to be involved with, especially when it comes to long term relationships.

Then there’s a myth that has been installed in everyone’s head believing that when a woman reaches a certain number of sex partners that she no longer has vaginal walls or tightness which is a flat out lie.

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Psychology Today says that the vagina’s tightly folded muscle tissue is very elastic, like an accordion or the mouth. When it’s at rest–all the time except sexual arousal and childbirth–the vagina’s muscle tissue remains tightly folded like a closed accordion. As women become sexually aroused, vaginal muscle tissue relaxes somewhat.

A tight vagina would prevent intercourse and reproduction from happening, so women evolved to have sexual arousal relax the vaginal muscles, allowing easier insertion of erections–and greater chance of pregnancy.

The arousal of a woman or how ever many sex partners she’s had doesn’t produce or stretch out her vaginal walls and it definitely doesn’t create a big opening since the vagina is elastic.

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On average women  require at least 30 minutes of sensuality—kissing, hugging, and mutual massage for their vaginas to relax enough to allow the penis to slide in comfortably. It gives women (and men) the warm-up time they need.

After relaxing during sex, vaginal muscle tissue naturally contracts—tightens—again. Intercourse does NOT permanently stretch the vagina. This process, loosening during arousal and tightening afterward, happens no matter how often the woman has sex, says Psychology Today.

Those myths can be put to rest now because these are the facts!

Honestly, a ‘body count’ is irrelevant because we were meant to be sexual beings. You shouldn’t label someone based on their past encounters because a persons past has nothing to do with you. You shouldn’t be intimated by anyone who’s had sex with someone you’re being involved with now. It’s a big world but we all are related to someone and have mutual friends with people. You are the present! Focus on that and stop being worried about childish things.

Personally, I don’t prefer to have sex with many people because everyone isn’t deserving of me in that way and I’m a clingy and territorial person. YOU ARE MINE! Period!

So with the attitude I have, casual sex wouldn’t work for me.  However, I don’t look at myself as higher than others who believe different or move different because I understand their point of views. I’m still going to show you that same respect, regardless of what you choose to do with your body. To be real, its not that deep as long as you’re using protection and not laying down with people for the wrong reasons (low self-esteem or trying to fill a void).

Women don’t be ashamed of yourself for what you did years ago, months ago or days ago. Do whatever makes you happy and don’t let anyone make you feel that you’re less than. You don’t need the approval of others. Men don’t feel that you need to lie to impress anyone or give off this persona that you’re a player, even if you were. Things happen and people change. As long as you’re living in you’re truth now.. that’s all that matters.

Who Is The King of R&B Music?

‘I don’t know what y’all be thinking when y’all bring ’em round me. Let me remind you that I am the King of R&B.

– R. Kelly feat. T.I. & T-Pain (I’m A Flirt Remix)

On Sunday, November 9, 2019 the singer Jacquees boldly announced on his Instagram that he’s the King of R&B.

View this post on Instagram

Fuck it !!!

A post shared by King Of R&B (@jacquees) on

Like a typical Aries man he’s competitive, aggressive and smooth but Que I think you went a little bit too far, my boy.

Don’t get me wrong as a fan of Jacquees I’ve been there for everything the ‘Persian Rugs‘ and ‘Me, U & Hennessy‘ type of nights, the Mood mixtape, the collaboration album ‘F*** a Friendzone‘ that you had with Dej Loaf and the remix of Ella Mai’s Trip.

There’s no doubt that Jacquees is the R&B version of Lil Wayne because he remixes every song like Wayne did and y’all have to give credit when it’s due. Jacquees be going crazy! But R&B King? Naw I’m going to have to disagree. I still love you Que.

R&B is short for rhythm and blues. These elements are now mixed with pop, soul, funk, hip-hop, and electronic music.

Reddit says that three big things that define R&B are rhythm, vocals, and atmosphere. Vocals are usually emphasized in R&B with a lot of the genre’s vocalists often trying to sound sensual, smoother, or slicker.

Artists like Usher, Mary J. Blige, Janet Jackson, Chris Brown, Whitney Houston, Erykah Badu, Jill Scott, Monica, Brandy, Patti LaBelle, Chaka Kahn, Sade, Anita Baker, Fantasia, India Arie, Nina Simone, Gladys Knight, TLC, Xscape, The Isley Brothers, Jagged Edge, Keith Sweat, Shai, Donell Jones, Dru Hill, Jodeci, Lyfe Jennings, Boys II Men, SWV, Alicia Keys, Aaliyah, Maxwell, Avant, Ginuwine, R.Kelly, Tank, Marvin Gaye, Luther Vandross, Stevie Wonder, Smokey Robinson, John Legend, D’Angelo, and Miguel are R&B veterans.

R&B songs gives us real life situations of love, heartbreak, drama, intimacy, and makes us create great memories to them. That’s why 90s’ R&B is cherished the way that it is because it’s more than just sex. It speaks to the reality that we’re all facing or may face in our lives.

The-Dream tells NPR that R&B is the closest point to the reality of love that there is. You need it because that’s real life. So when you take out a song, suddenly we’re dancing to a song that doesn’t mean anything.

That’s much of what we do today, dance to songs that don’t have much meaning. This is the number one reason why old hits and legends in the game will always be respected no matter how old they are. Their music will live forever.

There’s no doubt that Jacquees is talented but he still has more growing and more songs to produce for his fans along with people around the world to hold the title of being the King of R&B.

P.Diddy does a great job of expressing this in his Twitter video:

Now to settle this debate I believe that the real King of R&B is the one and only R.KELLY.

Yeah I said it, it’s R.Kelly.

Yes I do recognize that R.Kelly is a pervert, that man has been sick in the head since the early 90s’. Remember him and Aaliyah? But that’s another subject.

R.Kelly as an artist is phenomenal. A singer, songwriter and record producer he has been giving us hits since the 1993. He gave us sex hits such as Bump n’ Grind, It Seems Like You’re Ready, The Zoo, Sex Planet, Sex Me, In The Kitchen, Slow Wind, and Half On a Baby.

He gave us family reunion songs like the Ignition (Remix), Step In the Name of Love, and Happy People.

He gave us songs from a woman’s point of view like and When a Woman Loves, Be Careful and When a Woman’s Fed Up.

He gave us inspirational songs like I Believe I Can Fly, I Wish, Worlds Greatest featured in Kirk Franklin’s ‘Lean On Me’ and U Saved Me.

He gave us songs of deception like Same Girl, featured in Kelly Price’s Friend of Mine, featured in The Isley Brothers ‘Contagious’, Down Low and the successful Hip-Hopera Trapped In the Closet Part 1-33.

He gave us party hits like Snake and I’m a Flirt (Remix) and lets not forget his unique songs Hair Braider and Real Talk.

R.Kelly is well rounded in the field of R&B and his artistry proves that he is overall the King Of R&B.

So readers tell me, do you agree that R.Kelly holds the crown of being the King of R&B or do you think that it’s someone else? Comment your thoughts.

Sex and Fitness

‘Is it worth it? Let me work it. I put my thing down, flip it and reverse it.. If you got a big, let me search ya and find out how hard I gotta work ya’

Missy Elliot (Work It)

Image from Bobby Gouse IG

Bobby Gouse, an instructor at Studio Three Chicago and AIR-Ariel Fitness has been teaching fitness for over 6 years. Originally from New York City, he began as an actor than switched to coaching children for Broadway shows. Then he started dancing for a dance cardio company called 305 Fitness. Soon after, he became interested in becoming a personal trainer and began taking classes to get certified. Gouse then came to Chicago to pursue his dreams in fitness. When I interviewed Gouse, he gave insight on how sex and fitness work hand in hand.

1. How do you think fitness benefits people’s sex life overall?

It’s huge, it’s not just ‘I want to have a eight pack or big boobs or butt’, it’s not just about looking good. You looking good for your partner and also looking good for yourself is important. Once you better yourself and look in the mirror saying ‘I’m really comfortable with how I look’, its really going to pay off in the bedroom and most of all mentally. Eating healthy, working out, and portion control. Once you feel super secure about yourself and you bring that into a bedroom it’s fireworks!

2. Do you recommend that people have a workout routine not only for their physical health, but also for them to not get tired quickly in the bedroom? Why or why not?

Definitely, because then you can lift your guy or girl. Also with Yoga you can become more flexible to get into different positions. Doing barre classes or an air class that has a lot of upper body strength and with those things you can totally bring that into the bedroom. A lot of core work also because core is your main thing that’s holding you up along with squats.

3. Do you think that exercise increases your sex drive and why?

Yes!, absolutely it’s scientifically proven.

4. Which part of the body does cycle help improve and how would that affect a persons sex life?

Cycling helps your legs, core, and butt. You’re mainly working your core, a lot of people think it’s all legs and it’s really not. Once you keep your hips still and you engage your core and sit that butt back, your whole body is engaged and it’s working everything. A lot of people are shocked with how many muscles you’re actually working when you cycle especially when you’re on the saddle. Those tap backs you can totally bring them into the bedroom and if you come to my class, I do plenty of tap backs and a lot of choreography that you can bring into the bedroom that make you feel sexy.

5. What other exercise besides kegel exercises would you recommend?

I would say doing squats with weights, yoga (yoga is super important) , planks, runner lunges — One leg in front, the other is back. Anything that you work your butt, legs, and inner thighs is huge and beneficial.

Health says that in men, regular exercise appears to be a natural Viagra. It’s associated with a lower risk of erectile problems. Research in women has found that those who are physically active report greater sexual desire, arousal, and satisfaction than women who are sedentary.  In an experiment was conducted with young women that required them to do intense cycling for 20 minutes prior to watching X-rated films. The exercise increases vaginal blood volume responses to the film and exercise.

That alone proves that a physically fit person is more likely to enjoy sex more than a non-for person. They have ten times the energy and are less likely to get worn out quickly.

HowStuffWorks says that the improved muscle tone can increase sexual gratification since orgasms depend on multiple muscle activity.

Yes ladies we’re aiming for orgasms not just to cum, there’s definitely a difference between the two.

Other benefits of working out is that it raises your heart rate, helps you find your balance, strengthens your pelvic floor muscles and connects you with your body.

Don’t just workout to have a better sex life, but workout to have a better health life in general. Remember to treat yourself well and eat right. Your body, mind, and soul depend on you to exercise so you’ll feel even younger in your older years to come.

I’m going to be honest, it’s way better to workout with friends so schedule a day when you and the girls or guys are just chilling with nothing to do and get a membership at your local gym. Get all the benefits of a better sex life, a healthier heart, and a in depth connection with your inner self.

Thanksgiving: Meeting the Family

‘I can’t imagine myself without you. I need a whole lot of help without you. Me and my granny both agreed, damn you’re such a G I’ll hold you down forever.’

– Big Sean feat. Miguel (Ashley)

Image from InfoNG

It’s Thanksgiving and you’re meeting the family for the first time. This is definitely a big deal because Thanksgiving is basically the part 2 of having a family reunion. Your partner isn’t just going to bring anyone home for the holidays. This is a big step in the relationship.

Bustle says that the holidays are a time for us to celebrate family, friends, and love, and by including  you in their celebration, your partner is embracing you and all that you are.

There immediate family are coming along with the Aunts, Uncles, and cousins from out of town. You have to make a good impression on them especially your future in laws, so what do you do?

Rule #1

Respectful and Polite: Show them that you have manners because how you present yourself speaks on how you were raised. First impressions are everything! Make sure you SPEAK to Grandma and Mom especially! You can’t just be walking into other people’s homes without speaking. Also, don’t try too hard just be yourself.

Rule #2

Compose yourself. You know that they’re going to interrogate you because they want to know who their son or daughter is bringing home. Be calm and breathe! Answer their questions honestly but carefully and be thoughtful in your answers.

Rule #3

Help out in anyway possible. Ladies, if Mom needs help setting up the table, do that. If Auntie needs help getting ingredients for desserts or even needs help making desserts, do that. If Grandma needs your help to make the baked macaroni and cheese, do that. Fellas, if Dad is watching the game and invites you to politic with him and Unk, do that. Take the initiative and get involved in the family activities that they’re doing.

Rule #4

Feel out your partner’s family. Notice how they interact with each other and even how they interact with your partner. This will tell you a lot about his/her background and what kind of family they come from. Try to make a connection with someone there.

Beforehand talk to your partner about how you can have each other’s backs. It’s intimidating to come into a new environment when you don’t know anyone and some family members can throw shade making you feel uncomfortable.

Make sure that you and your partner talk about how you can look out for each other and do small things like sit next to each other or check in with one another occasionally. Relationship expert, Dr. Stan Tatkin talked to Insider and he says that that’s the idea of being a couple. They protect each other. They have each other’s backs, even with people that are familiar.

Prepare each other for other family dynamics and think extreme such as heated debates about politics, the interrogation process, drunk fights, and family secrets getting exposed. Clarissa Silva, behavioral scientist and founder of C Silva Solutions tells Bustle that it’s important that the couple are on the same page and can help minimize some of the nervousness your partner might feel.

To all my couples, did you meet your partners family over the holidays? If so how was the experience?

P.S. I have to show y’all some of the food my Mom made for Thanksgiving, she went crazy. This isn’t all of it but these are just my favorites.

Collard Greens

The best part of this is the juice especially when it has hot sauce in it.

Cornish Hen Chicken

My mom uses this as a substitute for turkey because turkey is just too dry to even try to eat.

Baked Macaroni & Cheese

This is the best thing ever created in life! I could literally eat this every single day. Not everyone knows how to make baked Mac & Cheese which is surprising because to me it’s easy to make, but just wow! I prefer this instead of the box version.

Dressing

This with cranberry sauce is a instant hit! The flavor is everything

Ham

I had to take a close up picture of the ham. Look at all those juices, the pineapples on the top made it even better.